Soapboxish.

Dear Facebook,

A Few Things :

1) - You. You there, the one with the status after status about how ugly you are and how much you hate your life and how you don't understand why you're alone and boys/girls don't like you and you need to lose weight and blah blah blahhhhh... Someone out there does love you, and someone does care, you are not ugly, and you do not need to make your status tacky to get attention to feel better! Really, I promise. Everyone has bad days but you should smile while you delete your mile long list of depressing mumbo-jumbo:) Really! Smile! Before you forget how!

2) - To every drunk girl ever - Don't post pictures, it was only cool if you were there & drunk too. Clearly we didn't enjoy it as much as you did. We don't need 97 pictures of your eyes rolled back in your head? p.s. - leggings aren't pants.

3) - STOP TAKING QUIZZES FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY.

4) - Farmtown is boring... i'll admit I played once but your farm wasn't as good as mine so please don't send me pictures of your attempts.

5) - If you don't want people to call you by your first middle & last names collectively, then don't make it your profile name? When I see you in public you can be sure I will only call you by the goofiest one. thanks.

6) - Remember when bumper sticker ruled this place? What happened? I miss it.

7) - Don't tell me when you're bored. It is already evident we ALL are... we. are. on. Facebook.

8) - Pageant Girls. You're pretty. THAT IS WHY YOU'RE IN PAGEANTS. But I'm hereby giving you a FIVE 'picture of me in my dress winning my crown look how tan I am' maximum. Did you hear me? Only 5. Not 555. Don't care if you have a interview outfit either, that is a part of the 5. oh, and sash pictures too. Glad we've settled this.

9) - If one more person asks me an inappropriate question on facebook chat at 3 in the morning i will probably explode. I know you're a perv but please keep it to yourself and I'll see ya later on 'To Catch a Predator'

10) - Please. Never learn to spell, I love laughing at you.

11) - The person with the most tagged pictures of themselves wins. Really. I'm challenging you. I'm at an EMBARRASSING 2,400 so I've decided i'll just own it instead of frantically deleting tags... Go on, try me. I can take you on. ;)

12) - I know what you're thinking - hmmm this note is rude. Well know this - I'm partly kidding but i'm mostly serious.... ummm... :) :) :). also, I'm making fun of myself cause i'm on facebook toooooooo much but this makes me feel I like have the authority to lay down the law ;)

thank you and goodnight.